How to Survive College with no Money

IMG_8636If you’re an senior this year, you need to get familiar with the words “Ramen Noodles”. This is your breakfast, lunch, and dinner next year. The Marathon gas station is now your Starbucks, and Taco Bell is now your Chipotle. You can’t afford anything else! You can’t even try to avoid the dreaded “Freshmen 15” because fruits and veggies are too expensive. What you need to realize is that




You have this thing called a budget. Students nowadays freak out when find a faded, crumpled up, half ripped dollar in their pocket. They’re so excited in fact, they don’t even know what to do with it! Below are a few tips that should get you through your years at college with no money.

gas_moneyTip #1: Offer people rides to and from work, or school.

Take them anywhere their hearts desire! Why? Because they have GA$ MONEY. If they deny your offer, just keep saying, “No, no, no, I insist!” Eventually you’re going to annoy them and they have no other choice but to accept. You also need to remember the saying, “If ya don’t give the dough, ya don’t get to go.” Make that a well known rule! If they don’t want to pay you, smile and stop the car. They can either PAY UP or walk.

Another thing to remember is DO NOT ACCEPT I.O.U’S. You will never get paid if you do that!

Tip #2: When you get to college, you can forget all about name brands.generic

If you need to wash your hair, use Generic Shampoo and Conditioner. It’s the cheapest kind out there! You can’t afford all that fancy stuff with extra volume and shine. In college, you don’t even need name brand clothes! American Eagle and Hollister? Nope. You should be walking your happy self to Goodwill, if you don’t already. Thrift shopping is great! You can replace your entire wardrobe for 10 bucks!

drink-coffee-do-stupid-things-faster-energyTip #3 Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.

This is going to be your best friend during your entire college career. Some people disagree, and say that the abundance of coffee in college is just unhealthy and does not benefit you. Don’t listen to them!

• Coffee keeps you awake because you will be tired all the time… Mostly because of Netflix marathons and parties.

• Coffee keeps you healthy when you “forget” to go to the gym. It provides your body with antioxidants, which make you feel better about yourself.

• Coffee is the only thing that motivates you to do your laundry. Yay, Clean clothes!

• It is scientifically proven that coffee helps you receive higher scores on tests and quizzes.

So there you have it folks! To survive college, just carpool, stay away from name brands and expensive things, and drink tons of coffee. Take this advice and run with it! This is probably the best advice that you could ever have in your back pocket.

May the odds be forever in your favor.

Article submitted by Madison Arrington